What to Do? Cat Urination Behavorial Problems

First off, I apologize for the lack of updates. Life continues to be a little crazy. Second of all, this isn’t a writing or art related post. More apologies. This is something I need to say, though, as it is very dear to my heart.

For the last four years, I’ve had an indoor cat with a urination behavioral problem. He’s been like this pretty much since I adopted him. He was adopted at around six months old at a Pet Sense adoption. He was pretty much a replacement cat because the one I’d had before wasn’t working out in my new place.

The former cat was used to going in/out when he wanted and it was too dangerous for him to go outside at my new place so I let him return back to my mother’s country home where he is still happily living. Since my “pet fee” at my new place had been paid and wasn’t refundable, and because I was living alone and wanted some company, I decided I wanted to adopt a new cat and give him/her a home. I chose the new cat because when they opened his cage, he jumped into my arms. It melted my heart.

Benjamin (Benji) was an adorable kitten. He was really loving and sweet at first, but as we got better acquainted, I began to notice things weren’t all right with him. He kept having trouble covering up his business in the litter box. There were times where he’d get really wild and suddenly bite, scratch, or attack me. Then he started peeing on my furniture and clothes.

Over the course of four years, I feel like I’ve tried everything. My future mother-in-law took him to the vet but the vet said he was physically okay. I changed litter brands, but nothing worked. Cat Attract didn’t work. Unscented didn’t work. I made sure his box was in a private place, large enough, and had no lid. Still didn’t always work.

He would use the box but he would also use my furniture and clothes as his litter box. I tried changing it out daily. Didn’t help. Punishing him (spraying with water bottle, telling him “NO”, etc) didn’t work. Isolation seemed to work for a while (he LOVES attention but is NOT a lap cat) but then he started doing it again. My partner moved in and we moved to a new place. The peeing seemed to stop for a while and then it got worse. The cat started pooping in other places, too.

I tried to find him a new home, but who wants a cat with behavioral problems? I could have lied, but then the owners might have thrown him out or taken him to the shelter. I’m not sure what to do now. It seemed like he had stopped doing it for a while, but last night he peed on our bed. My partner almost tossed him outside. This cat has had so many chances, has been checked out, and I feel I’ve done everything possible to solve this problem, but none of the solutions are working.

I really don’t want to take him to the shelter. My mom offered to let us drop him off at her house in the country, but he will have to live outside. Honestly, I am considering it. Since Benjamin is very active and often aggressive (and always wants outside), I’m thinking him being an outdoor cat could work. He loves to chase and eat bugs. He has tried to attack dogs, and there aren’t many cars out on the road.

I hate to do this, but I feel he has a better chance at happiness and survival out in the country than me taking him to a shelter or continuing to deal with this. No one is happy. We are tired of the messes and the problems and he shouldn’t have to live the rest of his life isolated. I want to give him freedom. So is putting him outside wrong?

I love Benji and although there are times he is unlovely (his aloof attitude, his sudden attacks on me, his aggressiveness, his peeing and pooping everywhere), he has also brought me joy.

Who else will fetch “mousies” (mouse toys) for me? Who will pounce on the bed and paw at my face until I wake up to feed him? Who will jump up on the sink waiting for a fresh drink of water? Who will argue with me when I tell him “No?” Who will follow me wherever I go, even the bathroom? Who will beg me to brush him?

Example of me and Benji’s conversations:

Me: No.
Benji: Meow!
Me: No!
Benji: Meow!
Me: Meowr!
Benji: Meowr!

Now I’m wondering why I even wrote this post. I guess I am just so frustrated and tired. Nothing anyone suggests works on this cat, and I have to wonder if I’m the only one. I feel like I have failed Benji.

What do you think? Am I doing the right thing in taking him out into the country where my mom lives? Isn’t that better than taking him to the shelter where he will either be put down or never be adopted (I can’t see anyone adopting a cat with behavioral issues, I just can’t)? How much more can I do?
– J.N.

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